I am convinced that two thirds of the events in the Winter Olympics were invented simply to pass the time. The Summer Games have their share of quirks, but the Winter Games have curling and biathlon. Curling is usually the sport of choice to be ridiculed as stupid, since it is a game of shuffleboard on ice with brooms. But biathlon is incredible. If you don't know, biathlon is a round of cross-country skiing, followed by a round of target shooting. With a gun. So you watch a group of guys in wetsuits and sunglasses ski through a snow maze, then you drop to the ground to shoot small targets with a rifle, then you get up and repeat this procedure. These are the ravings of a madman made manifest. If this were the Summer Games, it would be Michael Phelps with a crossbow. At the Conservatory. But my wife and I watch them and we get very involved. On Sunday, in the biathlon final, we saw a guy make a mistake on his shot, and she said something like, "He's going too slow." He keeps making mistakes, he'll be too busy doing penalty laps to catch up. "And I said to him: “Fifteen minutes ago, you didn't know this sport existed! Who are you ?,