I wake up in a waiting room. Six blue seats on each side of the room were lined up perfectly. I'm in the one furthest from the entrance to the room, I'm the only one here. I look to my side and see an old stereo on a coffee table with a trash can underneath. A door leading to a bathroom is next to the table. This whole place seems strange, how did I get here? what am I doing here? The room is lit by fluorescent bulbs, a cheap floating ceiling is everywhere, white walls and carpet on the floor. the sound of the lights above is the only thing interrupting the noise in the room, everything is completely silent. My entire body feels helpless, it's a fatigue that consumes my limbs with no energy to lift or move them. I can just move my head and look around to see my surroundings. So familiar and yet I can't place the exact location of where I actually am. Hours pass as I become able to move again, motor functions restored, I become mobile again, I move my hand to the stereo and try to turn it on, the static begins to appear. chirps the box as I turn to the buttons and hear nothing. Finally, I give up and stand up. feeling dizzy, I walk to the door labeled bathroom and open it to find a closet-sized space with a toilet and sink. I quickly rush to the sink and wash my face. feeling the cold water is revitalizing at first until it starts to numb my lips and cheeks. feeling a little more able to move, I leave to try to find out where I am. There are three doors that lead to separate areas opposite the bathroom in the "waiting area" which I later named after waking up there. there is a door on either side and a big door right in front of me, I think it's the entrance however it is locked and I don't have the strength to break it at all...... middle of paper.. ....before. The waiting room chairs seemed to be the only option in this case since I preferred to use the bed only for sleeping and not try to block out the oppressive thoughts. The metal frame of the chair was cold, it froze me instantly at first, but after being in it long enough the temperature reached my body temperature and started to be bearable. I didn't want to close my eyes at this point and tried harder than ever to keep them open as long as possible. They started to burn after a certain point but nothing can match what I felt when I closed them. It's as if sleep and loss of light are exhausting me, pulling me away from my body and tearing my soul to another point in space. I fought for the pain not to come and yet I knew it was already a losing battle. I needed more than light to keep me going, I needed thoughts, well-orchestrated happy thoughts. So I started digging, digging deep.